There’s Someone Inside Your House Review: Woke Trash

After scrolling through Netflix the other night I stumbled across a new slasher to sink my teeth into as I bring you this There’s Someone Inside Your House review.

After moving to live with her grandmother in Hawaii, a teenager must confront her past after fellow students at her school are murdered.

Ah, the good old teen slasher movie is always a sit back, relax and disengage the brain type of movie that I can always enjoy but by the time the credits rolled on this one, there was a sour taste that not even Gaviscon could remedy.

Happy Death Day, the Halloween films and even the upcoming 2022 release of Scream has kept the slasher genre fresh in the minds of younger audiences.

With Netflix churning this one out at a rapid pace it’s clear to see it doesn’t even belong in the same sentence as those glorious titles of days gone by.

A killer is in town targeting teens whilst revealing some of their darkest secrets to their peers. A football jock who beat up a gay teammate, a Christian girl who guest-starred on a racist podcast and a young girl who pushed someone into a fire (as you do) during a sorority induction are just a few on the killers hit list.

What I did enjoy was the unique mask changes that the killer underwent throughout the movie. The killer would wear a 3D-printed face mask of the person they were about to kill.

That was a really nice touch and certainly linked the killer to the victim in a more intimate physical way than seen in most slashers but sadly the compliments end there.

There’s Someone in Your House is woke trash that constantly tries to force things upon us.

Climate change, racism, homophobia and more. You feel as though a millennial bible is being forced down your throat by a 3D-mask of Greta Thunberg staring into your soul whilst doing so.

This really is bottom shelf Netflix trash with drab performances, mundane kills and a ridiculous reveal of the killer at the end where you’re just satisfied with the fact that the movie is thankfully drawing to its conclusion.

Thin characters squeeze through this cancel culture script that fails to grasp your attention.

From ‘Screamy’ to cringy within seconds the film completely loses its way and is neither fun to watch nor easy to invest in.

Stay tuned for the killer’s monologue towards the end of the film.

You only need to hear that little uttering of bulleth shitteth to comprehend what your brain has just been subjected to for the films 1 hour and 36 minute runtime.

A few cool gory kill scenes and some funky 3D printed masks can’t save this one.

Avoid like the plague! 

There’s Someone Inside Your House Review by Sean Evans